This one is going to be fun, as I want to throw in a little contrast from last month’s article. The article last month was written from up north, and I had a car accident while up there and was stranded in the woods without service. Obviously, I lived and actually just got my car back this week after a month’s worth of repairs. Now, whether that is a good or a bad thing is something that we will explore a little bit.
We did receive snow this month, and I want to thank Dylan and the maintenance staff for doing an excellent job. The snow turned out to be challenging, starting as a mix of snow/sleet/and rain. All I know for sure is that our roads were much better than the ones outside the complex. This is a testament to the hard work and coordinated effort of our staff. The majority of you followed the guidelines from last month, but over twenty cars stayed on the road or parked in no-parking areas. If that was you, your vehicle was tagged, and you will be towed next time. Even if you weren’t tagged and you’re preventing us from completing the snow removal process, you will be towed. The goal is always to issue a warning, but depending on where you’re parked, we may not be able to do so. As one of the lawyers I work with always says, “Please guide yourself accordingly.” We are all adults and need to make sure that we follow simple instructions. I genuinely wish I didn’t have to issue these warnings constantly, but this is the reality of the situation.
I made several mistakes this past storm that I corrected before any of you realized. However, I am angry with myself as I know better. I almost made accommodations for individuals and not for operational reasons. As the old expression goes, “No good deed goes unpunished.” I am not one to act on my emotions, but I was tired and felt empathy, or more likely sympathy, for a few different situations/individuals. I will not make that mistake again, as it could have jeopardized things for others. No matter what we do in our lives, some will be happy, and others will be unhappy. Do what is right for the collective, not the individual, and if it only impacts you and another person, then do what is right for you. One thing that is an absolute truth is that when we don’t follow our heart, we end up in a life that wasn’t ours to live.
The sun isn’t coming up yet, but I can see outside finally, and it’s a reminder of time. We all only have a limited amount of it, and we need to use it wisely. When I was running through the snow-covered woods with no cell service in the afternoon, I knew my time to get out safely was limited. The facts were simple: I had no car, no cell phone service, and couldn’t get a satellite connection. My one and only option was to make it to the next town, which was ten miles away. I started getting scared and then angry about how I got into the situation, but more importantly, how I was going to get out of it. I wanted to blame someone, as that is our human default when something goes wrong in our lives; we need someone to blame.
I was blessed because I could only blame myself, and that was a hard reality to cope with, but I had no choice. Rather than focusing on the problem, I focused on the solution and accepted that I had to put all my energy into what I could control, not what I couldn’t. Which means I packed all my gear and headed to the nearest road and then to the closest town. Now I don’t know if I would have made it, as it was miles away, but I was prepared to face the consequences of my decision. Then, after some time, a car drove by, and I flagged them down, and surprisingly, they stopped. Several things followed to get myself and my car back, but what’s important is that I accepted responsibility for my choices and my life.
Many of us don’t do that even in the best of circumstances. Everything that goes wrong is somebody else’s fault. After this experience, I gave up the last two vices I had been struggling with, and I am curious to see what lies ahead. Several people told me to wait until after the New Year, and my answer was absolutely not. Change doesn’t happen on a specific date; it occurs when you decide to take control/responsibility for your life.
I can’t stand when people say that “when this happens, I will stop that” or “when I get this, then I won’t need to do that”, and so on and so forth. Life is hard, and we all have endless excuses not to do something. I could simply play the victim and attack others for my plight in life, but I don’t. For one simple reason, and that’s because it accomplishes nothing, but it does ensure that you stay in the same circumstances.
People with no friends always complain that they want friends, but then, when they have friends, they don’t treat them well. People complain they need money, but when they have the ability to work, they don’t. My favorite is when people who say they want to share their life with someone, but then, when they combine lives, they say they miss their independence.
Life is all about choices; make yours, and for the sake of everyone else, don’t blame others for those choices.
I have had to make some very difficult choices in my life, as we all have. Many innocent people have been hurt because of my choices, and for that I am truly sorry. I wish that hadn’t happened, but it did. Life started testing me very early on, and I failed for years, which makes sense because I was a child. I could very easily blame my upbringing for the behavior I displayed as a teenager and young adult. Except that wouldn’t accomplish anything other than making me a victim. I did bad things as a conscious adult, and I have had to pay for those things many times over again, and that’s fair. Whether we like it or not, we all have to pay for what we have done and what we currently do. So, stop focusing on what you can’t change and start focusing on what you can change. Be the person you want to be, and leave the person you don’t want to be in the past, where they belong.
January brings us the following holidays and days of significance: New Year’s Day, Epiphany, and Martin Luther King Jr Day.
Craig Pessin- HOA Administrator
